Sitting across from me was this Greek fellow who just went wild when the following hand occurred (keep in mind that he's a 38/24 with a reckless 3bet, steal, etc.):
Full Tilt Poker $0.25/$0.50 No Limit Hold'em - 7 players
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter
CO: $50.00
BTN: $103.85
Hero (SB): $53.85
BB: $22.35
UTG: $55.70 <-- DONK
UTG+1: $43.95
MP: $50.75
CO posts a big blind ($0.50)
Pre Flop: ($1.25) Hero is SB with 9d 8c
UTG raises to $1.50, 4 folds, Hero raises to $5.50, 1 fold, UTG calls $4
I 3bet, he flats. He's raising far and wide all day. Don't know what he's thinking, but okay...
Flop: ($12.00) 6s 8s 8h (2 players)
Hero checks, UTG bets $12.75, Hero raises to $30, UTG raises to $50.20 all in, Hero calls $18.35 all in
Nice! Unless you have 6's full, I'm in pretty good shape here, and I'm going to town with this one...
Turn: ($108.70) 2c (2 players - 2 are all in)
River: ($108.70) 9h (2 players - 2 are all in)
Final Pot: $108.70
Hero shows 9d 8c (a full house, Eights full of Nines)
UTG shows Qs Qc (two pair, Queens and Eights)
Hero wins $105.70
(Rake: $3.00)
So then he proceeds to go absolutely nuts in the chat box:
Donkey: FAKIN FISHJ
Donkey: !%#&&@$
Donkey: STUPID MOTHER FAKER
Donkey: FAK U AND UR WHOLE FAMILY
Donkey: STUPID DONKEY
ThePokerMeister: ME?
(I can't resist the urge sometimes...)
Donkey: BI T CH
ThePokerMeister: LOL
ThePokerMeister: TNX
Donkey: GO FAK URSELF FAKIN IDIOT
ThePokerMeister: i will try
Donkey: A SS HOLE
ThePokerMeister: but too many ribs in the way
(It's true, I've tried it...)
ThePokerMeister: buy back in tho
ThePokerMeister: i'll try to F u
ThePokerMeister: again
Donkey: U RE THE MOST STUPID MOTHER FAKER EVER
Donkey: A S SHOLE
ThePokerMeister: try to get ur money back
Donkey: I WILL FAK U
Donkey: =STUPID DONKEYS EVERYWHERE
ThePokerMeister: glad u came to ur senses
(he buys back in)
Donkey: I WILL FAK U MOTHER FAKIN IDIOT
ThePokerMeister: my mother?
Donkey: NO U
Donkey: U STUPID CLOWN
ThePokerMeister: how u gonna do that?
Donkey: U RE PROPABLY JERKIN OFF ALL THE TIME
Donkey: A S S HOLE
ThePokerMeister: through the internet?
Donkey: YEAH I LL PUT MY D CK IN THE WIRE
ThePokerMeister: sometimes i do that
(Never; this is a lie)
Donkey: FAKIN DONK
ThePokerMeister: fakin donk?
Donkey: YES FAKIN DONK
Donkey: FAKIN FISHHH
ThePokerMeister: faking donk?
Donkey: 89
ThePokerMeister: i'm not a real donk?
Donkey: U RE THE DEFINITION OF DONK
Donkey: A S S HOLE
ThePokerMeister: it's true
Donkey: CLASSIC STUPID AMERICAN FISH
ThePokerMeister: true
Donkey: U RE PROPABLY EATIN ONLY MC DONALDS
(???)
Donkey: DONKEY
ThePokerMeister: stacked u tho
Donkey: THATS WHY U HAVE NO FAKIN BRAIN
ThePokerMeister: didnt i?
Donkey: LOLOLOLOLOL
Donkey: ARE THAT KIND OF STUPID???
Donkey: 89???
Donkey: ??
ThePokerMeister: overplay much?
Donkey: GO READ A FAKIN BOOK STUPID MOTHER FAKER
ThePokerMeister: -35 mean anything to u?
Donkey: WHAT IS THAT??
ThePokerMeister: ur lifetime losses
(I probably shouldn't go there, but again, I can't resist)
Donkey: LOL
Donkey: U RE SO FAKIN STUPID
Donkey: I M 10 GRAND UP STUPID AS S
(And I'm the president of the United States)
ThePokerMeister: best thing is that u just simply gave me ur stack
ThePokerMeister: it wasnt even a challenge betting it outta u
ThePokerMeister: drawing to 2 outs
ThePokerMeister: next time at least make it a bit of a challenge
Donkey: I LL GET IT BACK SOON STUPID FAK
ThePokerMeister: what is a "FAK"
(Unfortunately, I can't egg him into explaining...)
Donkey: IN THE MEANTIME GO READ A BOOK OR STH FAKIN GAMBLER
(HUH?)
ThePokerMeister: LOL
Donkey: U RE A DONK
ThePokerMeister: a donk and a scholar
ThePokerMeister: so what is a "FAK"?
Culminating in his final hand, where I can't resist:
Full Tilt Poker $0.25/$0.50 No Limit Hold'em - 9 players
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter
BTN: $50.75
SB: $89.10
Hero (BB): $103.40 <-- FAKIN DONK(?)
UTG: $17.50
UTG+1: $17.10
UTG+2: $50.00
MP1: $53.50 <-- DONK
MP2: $75.55
CO: $52.55
Pre Flop: ($0.75) Hero is BB with 9d 9c
3 folds, MP1 raises to $3.50, 4 folds, Hero calls $3
Flop: ($7.25) Td 3s Th (2 players)
Hero checks, MP1 checks
Turn: ($7.25) 7h (2 players)
Hero bets $4.50, MP1 calls $4.50
River: ($16.25) 5c (2 players)
Hero bets $8, MP1 calls $8
Final Pot: $32.25
Hero shows 9d 9c (two pair, Tens and Nines)
MP1 mucks Qs Ad
Hero wins $30.65
(Rake: $1.60)
ThePokerMeister: Oops!
I know
Waffles isn't from Greece, but is this his twin?
I feel like SH.RO.MI is not barreling for 2+ streets of value without something good to very good to the nuts. His game is usually to fire a cbet with an AK hand (never raising AQ from EP), and check / fold later streets unless he hits. Therefore, I have to give him credit for a hand here. Either he's running a bluff (rare) or has me; What hands do I beat that he can be going for 2+ streets? 99-TT. Otherwise, he's got me crushed with QQ-AA, so this is a 60/40 decision. I'm giving him credit for the top end rather than the bottom.
Final Pot: $12.75
UTG wins $12.15
(Rake: $0.60)