Thursday, September 5, 2013

Quick addition to the Maryland Live! post

First: Happy Rosh Hashanah to my fellow Jewish readers.  Have a Happy New Year!

Fictional depiction of my wife:

Now to the point of the post:  I forgot to mention that since I signed up for a new card, I got $10 in free slot play (new card members get a spin on a wheel to determine how much free slot play they win from $10 to $750).  So, as a continuance from the prior post, I finished my last hand at poker and ran down to the Cheesecake Factory, where my wife & kids were waiting.  I knew I had this $10+ free play sitting and wasn't sure whether I'd have to redeem it today or lose it, so after dinner, I went over to customer service to see what's up.  Well, since I was with my family, I couldn't very well take the kids into the casino.  However, the casino is set up where the slots are located right next to the entrance, where spectators can stand without actually going into the casino.

If you've been reading this blog for awhile, you know that I abhor slot machines; I don't believe you can win at them.  In fact, my son was commenting to me about how many people there were playing the slots and how it's (his words, not mine) a "sucker's bet."  Anyway, my wife & I decided that she would gamble the $10 by the gate so that the kids could see us degen it up.  So there my wife sat, opting to play a $0.02 machine by the door - can't remember the name or type of machine at the moment.

Now I don't think my wife particularly enjoys slots either, but she does like it more than me.  However, she has a methodology for how to play free money which consists of cashing out after every win she gets.  In other words, she'll run a few $$$ through the machine, and when she hits a winner, she cashes out the winning money instead of letting it wash through the machine again.  FWIW, I'd imagine our expectation on the free play (total wild ass guess, as 67% of statistics are made up on the spot) is around a 50% return, as has been our historical return.

Well, she demolished that historical return.  We watched her max bet "lose" around $3 ($0.50 per spin I think) before winning $0.20... meh... cashout.  Then she dropped down another $4 when the following happened: the slots spun and she lost the spinner part, but won "free spin time," or something like that.  After a bunch of bells & whistles (2 of the kids were less than interested), we started watching more intently.  Suddenly, the machine announced that she hit the mini jackpot - $230!  I don't keep stats on the free play / slots returns, but I'd imagine our return on slots is in the neighborhood of 30,000%!!!  Booyah!  I just hope she doesn't want to start a new career as a professional slot player.


  1. That's a great return on free money. I hope I can stay away from the "sucker's bet" machines when I go to Vegas next week. I've been a little bit of a slot junky the last couple years and it has cost me. This time it's going to be about the poker.

  2. I just hope she doesn't want to start a new career as a professional slot player.

    She's smarter than that.

  3. 230 big ones..!! Gratz

    Also <3 Rosh hashanah cos it sounds like my name


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